Category Archives: Men

Whisker Windfall

This Labor Day was the twentieth anniversary since I grew a goatee. Haven’t seen the ugly under those hair follicles in this century!

Several weeks ago Janet and I traveled, and in Keystone, South Dakota, I shaved.

I was shocked! Without hair on my face, everything looked different!

At least my receding hair line, even if it’s in a steady retreat, is a gradual reveal.  It’s like a slow descent plane landing.  But shaving cold turkey and going lickety-split from whiskers to clean shaven after twenty years, well that’s an engine failure crash landing!

I felt like I needed to introduce myself to the guy staring back at me in the mirror! Who is this stranger?

The worst part, however, was somehow, sometime in last twenty years, someone snuck another chin under the original! It doesn’t look like a double chin with facial hair, right?

But now, my face looks pregnant! Nine months. With twins! Continue reading Whisker Windfall

Golf With a Putter and Six Iron

A few years ago a handful of my high school buddies started getting together every year. They’re great guys and I’m always glad to see them!

But every year we do something they love, I loathe. Golf.

I’m not talking about fun golf, like Putt-Putt, where you navigate obstacles, putt over the astro turf hill, and maybe even win a free game with a hole in one at the Windmill. Nope!  Nothing fun like that!

They like golf-golf, where you whack a little white ball (orange for me so I can find it in the woods) and hit it over acres and acres of mowed grass that’s had gallons of ‘Weed Be Gone’ sprayed on it. The only goal is to knock the little ball in a coffee cup in the ground that you can’t see.

Psft!  What are they thinking?! Continue reading Golf With a Putter and Six Iron

Just Two Little Letters — 2

~Disclaimer: This is the second satirical post and only meant to entertain, maybe even cause a grin, snicker or smile.  The first post is here.  And yes, there are ALWAYS exceptions.  For the record, no words were injured in the writing of this post, so please don’t injure the writer. (Wink, wink.) ~

It’s weird! Men and women have fun differently!  Granted, there’s no hard and fast rule, but generally the pendulum swings two ways.

Men feel friendship with other guys by doing stuff together.  Here goes:

Two men. They get up at 3:15 AM in cold weather, and meet 3:45 AM sharp at a gas station.  They go inside, fill their thermoses with coffee and get in a truck together.

“Good morning”, one says.

“Morning”, says the other. Continue reading Just Two Little Letters — 2

Just Two Little Letters — 1

Writer’s note! This is satirical and not intended to insult two particular groups, men or women.  OK, I guess this runs the risk to offend everybody, but still, it is written with a wink., smile and laugh. Any similarity to any person, past, present or future is strictly coincidental…

Two letters! That’s all. Man. Wo-man.  Same species, I think. But galaxies apart!

I’m in a chain email group with 6 or 7 high school buddies. When the first email starts, a series of rude comments and insults ensue, much to the delight of all!

When we actually see each other, the greetings among our guy friends includes a hand shake or a bear hug, seldom both.

Bear hugs, however, must be in accordance with the Guy Book of Rules.  Any violation of these imaginary rules results in loss of  “guy points”.  Multiple violations may result in permanent loss of the “man card”.

Rule 17 in the book, section 2, bullet 3, subset 4(a), clearly states that IF you hug a guy instead of shaking his hand, it’s very brief. I mean, break a china glass on the floor brief. And never, ever, ever more than a second.  In fact, prolonged hugs, according to subset 5(d), can result into a justified fist fight. Continue reading Just Two Little Letters — 1